I asked God today, “How much more is he going to take me through?” and the answer has not been yet been given to me. But he will. God doesn't put anything on us that we can't handle. And I know that he still loves me, and that I need to get myself in order and right with him. I'm very devastated over the death of my husband, but I know    that I must keep going on and stay strong through it all.

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He Is Not Who I thought He Was
Heather Hubert

I have been going through an abusive relationship for the past year. We have been together for two years. The physical abuse began when we started using crystal meth very heavily. It would start off with verbal altercations we would call each other names and he would snap and start choking or punching me. He once choked me in front of my children until I went into convulsions and when he realized what he did he stopped. I thought that he was going to kill me that night. The physical abuse eventually occurred everyday. I don't know why I continued to stay in that relationship.

I love him and I know that when he is not using he is not this person. He is not abusive at all when we are not using. But as soon as he is on dope he starts looking for reasons to fight. He'll start questioning me and making up off the wall accusations just to start an argument. When he snaps you can see the changes in his eyes and his face. It's like he's somewhere else and a completely different person. Its scary because he doesn't even know what he is doing. Then he suddenly realizes that he is hurting me and my children, he immediately stops and starts apologizing and tries to hug me and hold me. At that point I just want him to get away from me. He keeps coming at me trying to force me to let him hold me. I don't know what to do because I want to help him and I know that he isn't that kind of person inside.

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Jill W.
For the last 15 years, I have fought and battled with my younger sister's drug and alcohol abuse. For the last 6 years my husband and I raised my sister's 6 year-old daughter – who by the way is a beautiful and wonderful child. I have battled and tried to find strength to deal with or even help my sister. I now find that what I am really fighting for is the happiness and well being of my niece. And I know I cannot fight my sister's battles with her demons, but let her fight on her own. One day she will realize what she is missing out on.

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Being On The Right Track Takes a Lot of Changes
Tarzan

My biggest battle is that I was a drug user and seller. I'm now serving an eight-month sentence right now and I thank God I'm here at this facility, W.R.C, to get my life back in order. I'm going to N.A, D.A.A.P, De-Bug, gardening classes and now I'm thinking about getting my GED. I went to find work, and will hopefully go to work as a housekeeper. This week I'm going to DMV to get my ID. I feel like I am on the right track.

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Losing my Sense of Self is a Constant Battle for me
Lynda Adams

Losing my sense of self is a constant battle for me. The programs I've been in have given me great tools for healing and recovery. But I sometimes find it easier to talk the talk than to walk the walk. I claim a faith in Jesus, but a few times when I have been put to the test I've responded in anger and/or run in fear. To be a strong confident woman, walking in grace to be mom again to my son and to have all the hell I've been through since choosing to commit a crime makes sense -- this is my prayer. My strength truly is that I do learn form my mistakes and I do always return to my Jesus for strength and to continue the walk.

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Leaving Them on the Shelf
Jenn

It wasn't the money I needed, I just wanted to fit in.

Not taking my medications is how I pleaded, but any form of stealing is a sin.

Now I am serving one year in county jail, hoping and praying for a kind word in the mail.

Day after day I feflect, and with lots of soul searching I look to my guardian angel and God to protect.

With only a month and a half to go, I have learned more than you'll ever know.

My faith, family, fiancé, sanity, and integrity are just a few positive developments about myself, All the battles and war stories are now left on the shelf.

 

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