Get In While You Can
Building a Border Wall Could Be An Investment Opportunity
Story by Milton Cadena
Art by Fernando Amaro Jr.

Hey, listen me friend investor, I got a tip. The US government is about to open its huge pockets to build a Wall. No, no Wall-Mart, I mean Da Wall on the south border facing Mexico. Not just here and there, but across the south. So, if you are interested in this easy money opportunity I need
from you your commitment to cooperate with capital to submit a good proposal that would appeal to the buyer. Please find here some points to be considered before we enter the bidding process:

The Design is of big importance, since government officials pay close attention to our nation's image in the world. So I propose a nice 'Pueblo' style wall, made out of adobe and brown roof tiles, recreating the ambiance of the Spanish colonial architecture. They can have cute watch towers
every couple of miles where Minute Men can reside and comfortably perform their civic duty. The cost will be extremely low, in comparison with our competitors, since it will be made of regular Adobe and worked by immigrants paid with low-wages and not benefits. Such workforces abound in that area, making the recruiting process free. This can be an opportunity to show our
tangible cooperation for international development. The efficiency will be demonstrated by having a welcoming door every two miles with a sing reading "Mi Casa es su Casa" (My house is your house) and a table with a bi-lingual application form to enter the US. Now here is the trick: there will be several irrelevant questions, but one of them will ask in a very casual manner: Are you an Illegal Immigrant? And they being the simple people they are will answer 'pos*Sí' (which means: eh*Yes), which will be followed by the sudden detention of the undocumented person and transfer to the Guantamo US Military Base for a friendly debriefing.

Sustainability is an obvious factor, since our government is accountable to their taxpayers who demand more bang for the buck. So we will set different revenue opportunities that will pay the wall maintenance and upgrades. I envision more than a Wall, but a Endless Board where our true values can be displayed to the entire world. It will be adorned with US Border memorabilia, such as: Minute Man action figures, Instant Polaroid pictures at the wall, collectible cards and posters of different walls around the world, like the Berlin Wall or the Great Wall of China, wall paperweights with US-Mexico flags, key chains, survival kits for the casual immigrant, and so on. You name it, we will have it. Future Investment Opportunities will definitely appear when ours become among the best practices. A wall for the Pacific and Atlantic coasts will be needed in the near future, since illegal immigrants will try to use boats and sooner or later we will be worried about those Canadians on the North. Finally, I don't want to go to extremes, but who knows and a major continental lead can be build to protect ourselves from extrateretrial aliens, although chances are that can be taken care by the sky shield.

My dear investor, I am so looking forward to hear from you about this promising investment.

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