I Just Want to Be Exploited
An Ex-Felon Considers “Immigrant Channels” to a New Identity
Story by Amadeaus
Photo by Isabel Gonzalez

Life as a felon is no life at all. Even trivial offenses like graffiti can make the prospects for employment bleak. The irony is that although people with felonies on their record don't get hired, the first requirement of probation is acquiring gainful employment. That is why I am considering taking a cue from my undocumented brothers starting from scratch with a new identity.

When I was a kid, older kids told me not to trust anyone who never did any hard time. Only later did I learn that doing time temporarily will mess up your life permanently.

Over the past few months, I have turned in dozens of applications, but since I have a criminal record, I am rarely called back even for entry-level jobs like bussing tables. Despite my attempts, I am the last person that employers will consider hiring. I am the bottom of the barrel, farther down than immigrants who are also struggling.  

I feel like immigrants have better opportunities for the American dream than Americans who have been in the criminal justice system. I hate to say it, cause it sounds biased, but I feel that immigrants are thought to be easily exploited, so are considered more desirable for low-end work. I just want to be exploited too; to start at some entry-level position and do something positive that is a means to an end. But young adults who were raised in harsh circumstances and are “streetwise” are the last people an employer wants to give an opportunity to.

Don't misunderstand me, I am not hating on my Mexican brothers and sisters, and really respect them and their struggle. If anything, I want to learn how they do it--come to a new place, learn the language, face hostility and other obstacles and still carve a slice of the American way of life. It may be that the only for me to get a job is to become a new person.

I was talking to one of my friends who is undocumented and is familiar with getting false social security numbers. I was amazed at how easy it is to get a new identity. For me, assuming a new identity is about just trying to get the same piece of the pie as a non-felon. It kind of hurts, ‘cause along with identity and my felony record, I will have to give up the work experience and volunteer work I've done since18. I've donated time at homeless shelters, taught kids how to do murals, and how to write to express themselves.  All that is overshadowed by a criminal record though—and all that will be erased if I change my identity in order to shed my record.

I've already thought it what it might take, and what could jeopardize my chances. The prospect of ever being fingerprinted at a job could sabotage my new plan at success, so I would have to avoid those employers. I am going to go through the immigrant channels to get the identification that I need.

I feel like I've been slapped in the face by the system over and over again, yet I am not selling drugs, guns or women's bodies. I have changed my ways, but employers don't care. I've even tried to join the Army and Marines--first when we invaded Afghanistan and again when we invaded Iraq--and was turned away by both.  I'm just trying to get right and go through the hardships of legit life as a working class American, who had all the opportunities of our society at one time and threw them away.

My answer is to avoid the pull of the underworld and try a new approach to work--falsifying my identity, moving away and starting a new life from nothing. I have to admit it scares me to move where I have no home, no friends, no knowledge of the area and dangers. But I know it is possible to make it.  

People have started with less and gone through much more before me. The thousands of immigrants who crossed the border and are employed and surviving are an example for me.

Post a Comment:
(De-Bug will publish e-mails on this page as soon as possible.)