Crew Trust
Short Fiction and Art By Samuel Rodriguez

“What the hell do you mean you don't trust me?!” Eddie asked me with a pissed off look on his face,   “Not just you Eddie, but all of you too!” I said to everyone that was playing cards with us in the kitchen, “What the f**k! Why not!” Steve exclaimed, “Well, the truth of the matter is…I don't trust nobody,” I replied with a blank stare. Steve looked at me and said, “F*&k! We got your back, why you gotta be like that?” Eddie asked.  

“That's how I was taught I guess -- my grandparents, my moms, they always told me not to trust nobody, and they did the same,” I replied again with a soft tone. “That's stupid dude! You need to trust somebody…does that mean we can't trust you? You gonna b*&ch out if we run into beef…or what? Better yet, you gonna snitch on us if we all get popped together?” Steve asked angrily. I replied, “I can say all kinds of things, you know what I mean? But it don't mean nothing until it happens. You'll see what kind of person I am when it comes down to it, just as I'll see what kind of person you are,” I said.   “Screw that sh*& homes!” Eddie added just as drunk as Steve, “I think that's weak,” he then said, “Yeah, if we can't trust one another, then why are we in a crew together?”

I replied, “It's an ongoing thing, you don't just get with a bunch a fools and expect everything to be some big f*&kin' loyal pact, that's only in the movies. You gotta work for it, you gotta let time reveal shit…sure I know you guys…and I've seen how loyal you are as far as fighting goes, but are one of you gonna bail me out of jail? Are you down to write me letters if I get locked up? Will you send me a goddamn package of food n'…” “What! First of all…I barely could support my own self…second, a person can only do so much, but damn! I'd do what I could…how could you question that?” Eddie asked angrily, “Look, I ain't saying you guys wouldn't do all you can for your homeboys…but in this world, you can only truly trust your life with your old lady and your family, and tell you the truth I don't even know if one can trust them anymore…and I ain't perfect or claiming that I could do all that for you guys…I'm just telling you the truth and pointing out that trust has different levels n' sh*&…you know..like there's different degrees of trust like from 1 to 10…no …0 to 10, because some people   you can't even trust, even your own   family”… “Ah! Whatever, I still think that sucks,” Eddie replied.

“Screw it, the guy don't trust us, who cares, let's just play already!” Steve demanded.   Dimes walked in the room with a duffle bag full or paint and a large grin on his face and asked, ”You guys still wanna go out or what?” Steve and Eddie gave me a pissed off look.